Location: Chestnut & 34th Street, Baltimore, MD
Description: Zombies in wheelchairs? These George A. Romero movie premises are getting weaker and weaker.
When I first wrote in about interning at TGOH, I was just a naive up-start blogger with big dreams. I thought I’d seen it all until this magnificent specimen from Hamden fell — or, rather, rolled — into my lap. And quite frankly, I don’t know where to begin.
After all, this isn’t That Androgynous Creature’s on Heroin, and I never took any courses on Smack Addict Husbandry, so I’m just not qualified to determine this person’s gender, and my conclusion, that this a woman, might be unreliable. Regardless, the average dope fiend isn’t so great with color coordination. Combine that with her dangling necklace and unmistakable lean, and it’s clear that we have a Damsel-no-longer-in-distress thanks to that sweet, sweet vein gravy.
But let’s not jump to conclusions, we might have gotten ahead of ourselves. Perhaps we’ve just stumbled upon a Hamden O.G. who, after a shootout left him tragically paralyzed, is learning to C.R.I.P walk again. Maybe the sight of lavish green grass and a white picket fence lulled our friend into peaceful slumber, mind swirling with images of The American Dream™…
Maybe the only veins that haven’t collapsed are behind her knee. Maybe she missed the bus.
The only thing that’s certain is I have to take points off for sitting down, despite the… unusual circumstances. I deducted an additional fraction of a point as well, because I’m pretty sure those legs work. Keep these azure-colored gems coming, Hamden!